View Full Version : Question: getting the kids involved

Robin H in VA
02-15-2007, 05:06 PM
Hi Everyone

I am wanting to get started in B4 again, we have started so many times but ds was never into any of it. He loves the majority of the books, but just doesn't like to do anything.

I asked him today if he wanted to start doing the B4FIAR and/or FIAR again for learning time instead of the things we have been doing (he doesn't like to do that stuff either) and he said NO! I ask him what he wants to do and he just says play with his dinos, paint and color and draw, which is a real change:clap: He has never wanted to have anything to do with any of those things.

I really don't know what else to do.:unsure:

I try to make learning as fun as I can for him, but he just does not want to do it. Even down to playing games, he likes to play games, but he still doesn't understand some of them or just doesn't want to play the way it is suppose to be done.

I don't have a lot of hours to do things, and he is not a morning person at all. We're still working on that one.

Any suggestions??

I would like to get back into B4 by next week, have the weekend to work on a few things.

Thanks in advance

02-15-2007, 05:50 PM
One of the best pieces of advice I have read in a homeschool book was by Susan Wise Bauer in the Well-Trained Mind. She said (I'm paraphrasing) that a 5 year old will usually say "no" he/she doesn't want to do something when you ask them. They are just being 5. So, her point was not to ask, just to say "this is what we're doing." I do mine covertly! I never announce what we are going to for anything really. And I rarely ask if they want to do it for a couple reasons: Either they will say "no" even if it something I KNOW they will enjoy OR they get so worked up and excited we can't get the thing accomplished. Having said all that, this is how I do it. I simply sit down and read the book when I know they are in a favorable mindset to reading books. Usually we do it right after I put their brother down for his nap (they want to delay "quiet time" as long as possible) or usually before bed (again, like to read before bed and delay bedtime). If there is a hands on activity, I do it during the day, if it simply discussion then before bedtime. Bedtime is nice mellow time and children are usually more open to "discussion" and talking before bed. During the day I just go right into the activity and they have fun with it. I don't know that I'll ever announce it even when they are older. I think kids think that if it is "learning time" or something "official" it won't be fun. The great thing is that FIAR works very well to covert operations!:lol: Or just say, well right now we are going to do this anyway and it'll be fun! Then act like you are having the most fun in the world! Hope that gives you some ideas! Have fun!

02-15-2007, 05:52 PM
One way I get my kids involved- I give them choices as to which books to do-My 4 yr old gets the choice of 2 books- which one he wants to row for the week- Sometimes I'll let him look at the books on the shelf and pick one from there- but usually that's too overwhelming. My oldest- I ask him "what would you like to study"

Also a routine works great for reluctant kids- a few days into the routine and it's just second nature to read books and do school work. In fact today- I told my oldest he only needed to do spelling and work on a project. And told my 4 yr old he could just play upstairs. He kept coming down to the kitchen, I finally told him to go ahead and bring down his school box, and he happily did it (this is the same boy who balks at my suggestions for school time!) :clap: Sometimes I have to trick him into playing games, I'll let him play things his way for a few minutes- sometimes he just has to explore them a bit on his own, then tell him "ok my turn, here's my rules- we'll play the game this way"

If he's into dinos- maybe you could find some fun dinosaur books, and just do activities with those for starters.

02-15-2007, 07:19 PM
Sometimes, when Ted's being resistant, I just sit down and start reading aloud. Eventually he wanders over to see what's up. Especially if I'm reading to his sister and making a big deal of it.

Works well with artsy stuff too ... just dive in and see if he won't follow.

What are his interests?

02-15-2007, 07:47 PM
The thing I really like about B4FIAR is that it is so relaxed and flexible. When I try to put my dd on a tight schedule, things tend to not go well, but when we are truly relaxed and just enjoying the book, it goes much better. I reccomend just starting, like Jessi said and see how that goes.

Robin H in VA
02-16-2007, 02:33 PM
Thanks for the posts thus far.

My guy is resistent the majority of the time. Don't have anyone else in the house to "compete" with.

I did the choice thing that Andrea D suggested, this morning and he did choose one for next week. He is going to spend the day and then have a sleep over with MaMa H. today, so I a going to try to get some stuff together over the weekend.

I worry about being too relaxed. Worried that he will not learn what a kindergartener is suppose to know before first grade. And then I worry about what the school district will say. We have to either test or do a portfolio at the end of each year, so I get a little scared since we are still new to homeschooling.

My dd, 17 yro, well she just does testing and that scares me to death. I am always afraid that we are not covering enough.

Also, the curriculum that we use has to be something that is approved by out county. B4 and FIAR are not on that list. I do get around that though, but I am afraid that officials may ask about the curriculum one day.

Thanks again for the posts. Keep 'em comin'

Amy SD
02-19-2007, 11:09 PM
My 4.5 yo ds has a personality that sounds similar to your son's--sometimes it takes a lot of maneuvering to get him to do anything if he is not in the mood. BFIAR really took off for us with Katy-No-Pocket. He loved the story, and we had races up and down the living room, pretending to be each of the animals that we found in the book. Since he loves to draw and glue, we made a picture book of all the animals in Katy-No-Pocket using pictures printed off of google images. We just cut them out and glued them onto plain white paper, labeled them, and put them into clear plastic sleeves in a 3 ring binder. We also made a list of the possible animals for the cover of the binder. Anyway, this was one of our first successful "school" times. He still talks about all the animals and how they carry their babies.
Since then, it has been easier. We do focus on the art projects.