View Full Version : Holding it together

04-10-2012, 06:10 PM
I just got back from at appt w/an educational psychologist. My 8yo ds was just dx w/Dyslexia. My 10 yo dd was recently diagnosed as well. I am feeling so overwhelmed. They are both about 2 reading levels behind. Of course reading is not their only struggle, just the most pressing one right now. I know it will get better with time and I just need some time to wrap my mind around this but I am having a little trouble today being positive. It was hard enough with 1 SN child, but 2? Wow!!! It seems like reading curriculum is consuming our entire day and my poor 12 yo gets very little of me. We are also in the middle of vision therapy and will have to start OT once VT is over.

I think my biggest stressor right now is that I don't feel like I can share this with our extended family. My mother would flip if she knew about my dc's struggles and her only recommendation would be PS. She already thinks I am nuts. This will make her think I have gone over the deep end. Dh and I know that God has a plan for us and that hsing is part of it. It just can be so lonely sometimes, you know? I know I am preaching to the choir here but it helps to just put it into words sometimes and not keep it all inside.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Christi in OH
04-10-2012, 06:28 PM

I have a friend whose son is dyslexic, he has come a long way since they first figured it out. I know they did quite a bit of work with balance and body movement stuff.

Good luck to you. I pray you will find just the resources you need and just the people to support you on your journey. :group:

Natalie (SD)
04-10-2012, 06:49 PM
Sounds like a very hard day indeed.

My neighbor homeschools a large family. Her 3rd child (about 12 years old) has recently been diagnosed dyslexic. Prior to this diagnosis, I often heard the mom express her concern and frustration that DD's reading and writing weren't at grade level (or even close), putting the blame on herself (she wasn't consistent, doing the right thing, working with her enough, etc.) and she often said that she was mortified when any one (especially her parents) saw her DD's work - because it was so aweful, and she thought it reflected so badly on her whole homeschool effort.

Now that DD is officially diagnosed, and they have taken steps to address it, I have seen a total change in the mom, she is more relaxed, more empowered, more confident with what her DD is doing and how she is progressing, there is no stress in her voice when she talks about school, being behind, or her parents coming for a visit.

I don't know if this helps . . . just sharing that for one family at least it seems it got much better after diagnosis.

I know they are using a video curriculum, (but I am not sure which one, they are strong Catholics, so I would suspect it would be a Catholic curriculum, but again, not sure), and I know they are finding that very successful. Surely it doesn't address reading specifically, so I know that is a different hurdle. We actually have a tutoring center in our town that deals specifically with Dyslexia (the owner's husband and son are Dyslexic, and she is a retired educator), and I have heard the owner speak on the subject, and it sounds like there is a huge amount of help out there now. Not sure if this link is helpful, but just in case I will add it.


:) :group:

04-10-2012, 07:36 PM
Thanks Christi and Natalie. I do think a dx is freeing but stressful at the same time b/c now I know what to do, but boy is there a lot to do!! I am hesitant to bring our extended family into this b/c we have a history of gossip. I do not want my ds or dd to be the topic of endless speculation or our lifestyle choice to be the subject of conversation. I can't control what others say but out of respect for my dc, I would like this to be a private matter for now. We have been the focus of several anti-hsing "interventions" which were almost comical, but my patience for that has worn thin. I kept looking for the A & E camera crew. :lol:

Anyway, thanks for your thoughts.

Lindsey Carter
04-10-2012, 08:16 PM
I just want to give you a :group: and say I get it! I'm 99% sure my eldest is dyslexic (and very, very dyslexic) and my dd may be too. Why do people assume that a public school (with a 20+ to 1 ratio) is always so much better for a kid with ld? PS kids with dyslexia would generally only get help from being pulled out to see the special ed teacher for an hour or so a day and even that would probably still be in a group setting. While it is a lot of work for us as mom's I think we are more dedicated and can spend much more time helping our dc with dyslexia.

I try to remember that dyslexia doesn't equal unintelligent, academic failure, or an inability to hold down a job. After all Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Pierre Curie, Jay Leno and Tom Cruise are all successful dyslexics.

On an academic level, I have been very happy so far with Verticy as far as the Phonics/Spelling and Grammar/Composition programs go (the core stuff not so much). They even have special ed consolers you can call when you hit a wall with your dc. It's pricy, but includes a lot of great on-line resources an is research based. I've only been using it for a couple of weeks, so I don't know how successful it will be in teaching my ds to read, but so far so good.

We're in this together! You can do it!

04-10-2012, 09:18 PM
Thanks Lindsey, I have been following your posts this year and so I know you feel my pain. :) I do know that my kids will probably come out of this unscathed and hopefully I will still have all my own faculties intact but at times I wonder. I will be sure to blame my mental instability as I get older on them because there are times that I am sure I am worrying myself to craziness. I am using Recipe for Reading with good success for both kids. My 10 yo has jumped almost 2 grade levels since September but we still have a ways to go. I am happy with her progress. My ds is still struggling but I feel like these past few months he is really starting to get it and I do think he will probably make a significant jump in his reading abilities in the next few months. I do much better when I just do the next thing. When I start to overthink and look at how much there is to accomplish it feels so overwhelming. I need to stop doing that but sometimes I am forced to look at the reality from someone else's point of view it seems like such an insurmountable task. My dh has been my biggest cheerleader and for that I am so grateful.

Thanks for the encouragement!!

Lisa in Virginia
04-11-2012, 10:02 AM
My 9 year old son was officially diagnosed about a year ago. He also have severe auditory processing. He is about 2 grades behind in reading. It was recommended to us to get him a reading tutor which at the time was overwhelming to us.

I tried to get services from the school district. What a joke that was! They said that he qualified for an IEP but because we were homeschoolers he didn't qualify for specialized tutoring. :angry:

We ended up finding a tutor that is a learning disabilities specialist with the school district. She is a trained Wilson reading program tutor. We pay $45.00 a week for an hour lesson. He has been going since December and I see a big improvement.

I also put him on the Feingold Diet last August and noticed an improvement in him being able to focus on his reading.

Honestly, I don't do phonics with him anymore. I try to reinforce what the tutor does with him. I just ordered an Explode the Code book for him and we will do that occasionally. What we do is a combination of the following:

Sequential Spelling
Writing Skills Book A
Map Skills
Math U See
Independent reading BELOW his reading level
I have him read me 4-5 pages out of a reader at or above his level.
Worldly Wise

I make each lesson that we do short. We have done lap books this year on World War 1 and the human body and he learned a lot and really enjoyed that.

Hang in there! I was overwhelmed when he first got diagnosed but things are a lot better. Your kids are lucky that they have a mom like you teaching them! Don't feel pressured to enroll them in school either. I got a lot of that when we were diagnosed.

Praying for you!

Edited: Shelly, I just noticed that you are in Williamsburg! I am in Jamestown! Email me and I can give you Jack's tutor's name if you are interested!